December 31st, 2010
9 hours until year one of the most recent numeric decade comes to a close. While I've been considering a review of 2010 I've realized 2 things: 1- I've done WAY too much blogging to be able to recap them all. 2- This year is over and not only do I have a lack of interest in pop culture (which most people use for their "year in review"), but 2010 was a mediocre year. Who wants to read a blog about mediocrity? Not me, nor do I want to write one!
What better way to stave off mediocrity than Snookie? Yes, tonight at midnight the new year will be kicked off with Snookie climbing out of one ball to go home with 2 others that will spend 2011 itchy and medicated. Which leads up to my first prediction.
Prediction 1: Reality television will reach an all time low and I don't mean ratings. Eventually we're going to have to stop glorifying those idiots from New Jersey: Jersey Shore, Jerseylicious, Real Housewives of New Jersey (which aren't even housewives), Cake Boss.... If you've seen any of these shows you've realized reality TV is currently exploiting the mentally handicapped and like me, you're probably wondering how it get's worse than that. You'll find out this year.
You may not think my first prediction was going out on a limb because that's been the trend with reality television so with my second prediction I promise not to do the same.
Prediction 2: I win the lottery. Yes, I'm predicting in 2011 I win roughly 146 million dollars (after taxes) and when I do, you can't have any because I know you don't believe in me. I will, however, write one last lovely blog that says something along the lines of "I told you so EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE" then ride off into the sunset in my brand new 2011 Ford Focus. Ford Focus? Yes. I will be contractually obligated to be driving a Ford Focus because of my 3rd prediction.
Prediction 3: Todd Smiff is going to become a household name in an undisclosed manner. I will then stop talking in the third person and be offered a ridiculous contract by Ford where they pay me to hang out with Mike Rowe and drive the Focus for the next 3-5 years.
I know you thought after the first couple paragraphs I was going to have something smart and informative to say, but you were wrong.
Happy New Year!
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